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Child Mode – Playful Child

Acts in a playful, fun-loving, free and spontaneous manner; experiences genuine pleasure in people or activities; is open in the expression of their joyful feelings.


This Schema is a Healthy Child Mode

Child Mode – The Abused and Humiliated Child

The Abused child feels mistreated, abused, and betrayed and anticipates further abuse. The Humiliated Child feels worthless and incapacitated by shame while anticipating further humiliation.

These Schemas are Vulnerable Child Modes.

Child Mode – The Abandoned Child

Mode experienced following sudden traumatic separation from a primary caretaker. This can result in feeling all alone in an endless, dark place.

This Schema is a Vulnerable Child Mode

Punitive, Critical Parent/ Demanding Parent

The punitive, critical parent is an internalized, critical, blaming or punishing apparent voice; directs harsh criticism or punishment towards the self; induces feelings of shame or guilt.

The demanding parent directs impossibly high demands toward the self; pushes the self to do more, achieve more, to keep everything in order, to strive for high status, to put others’ needs before one’s own; never be satisfied with oneself.


These Schemas are Maladaptive Parent Modes.

Coping Mode – Detached Protector/ Detached Self-Soother/Self Stimulator

The detached protector uses emotional detachment to protect themselves from painful feelings; is unaware of their feelings, feels ‘nothing’, appears emotionally distant, flat, or robotic; avoids getting close to other people.

The detached self-soother/self-stimulator uses repetitive, ‘addictive’, compulsive or self-stimulating behaviours to calm and soothe himself; uses pleasurable or exciting sensations to distance himself from painful feelings.


These Schemas are Avoidant and Surrendering Coping Modes

Coping Mode – Angry Protector

Use’s a ‘wall of anger’ to protect himself from others who are perceived as threatening; keeps others at a safe distance through displays of anger; this anger is more controlled than in Angry Child Mode


This Schema is a Avoidant and Surrendering Coping Mode

Coping Mode – Complaining Protector

Complains, whines, and demands in a victimized, dissatisfied manner; expresses his dissatisfaction in an off-putting manner that masks his real feelings and needs.


This Schema is an Avoidant and Surrendering Coping Mode

Coping Mode – Compliant Surrenderer

Gives into the real or perceived demands or expectations of other people in an anxious attempt to avoid pain or to get their needs met; anxiously surrenders to the demands of others who are perceived as more powerful than themselves.


This Schema is an Avoidant and Surrendering Coping Mode

Over-Compensatory Mode – Bully and Attack

Uses threats, intimidation, aggression, or coercion, to get what they want – including retaliation against others or inserting one’s dominant position; feels a sense of sadistic pleasure in attacking others.


This Schema is an Over-Compensatory Mode

Over-Compensatory Mode – Conning Manipulator

Cons, lies or manipulates in a manner designed to achieve a specific goal, which either involves victimizing others or escaping punishment.


This Schema is an Over-Compensatory  Mode

The Chess Master

Uses Manipulation of others to achieve a specific goal.

This Schema is a variation of the conning manipulator, and is an Avoidant and Surrendering Coping Mode.

Over-Compensatory Mode – Self-Aggrandizer

Feels superior, special or powerful, and entitled to special rights; looks down on others; sees the world in terms of ‘top dog’ and ‘bottom dog’; shows off or acts in a self-important or self-aggrandizing manner; concerned about appearances rather than feelings or real contacts with others.


This Schema is an Over-Compensatory Mode

Over-Compensatory Mode – Paranoid or Obsessive Over-Controller

Attempts to protect themselves from a perceived or real threat, focusing attention, ruminating and exercising extreme control.

The obsessive type uses order, repetition or rituals.

The paranoid type attempts to locate and uncover a hidden (perceived) threat.


These Schemas are Over-Compensatory  Modes

The Downloader

Tells storied in mind-numbing detail, including many more details than are actually needed, causing the main thread of the story to be lost

The Coercive Self Aggrandiser

“You shall bend the knee to me, or die”


The Dilemma

Is it better to serve in heaven, or reign in hell?

The Chaos Mode

‘Introduce a little anarchy, upset the established order and everything becomes chaos. I am an agent of chaos.’

Limiting Re-Parenting

Righting historical wrongs. Limited reparenting involves reaching the Vulnerable Child Mode.

Imagery Rescripting

‘Walking your own personal tour of hell’


All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights… everyone has the right to safety, compassion, kindness and choice.